Saturday, November 8, 2008

Honey do, and of course I will... to the best of my...

One of my workers asked if I had a honey-do list waiting for me this weekend, and I never do - I build my own procrastination pile and play around it avoiding my duties - or so I will say so. Today was different, there is the installation of the bright beautiful vertical blinds. The crew will call around eight am and tell us what time they should arrive. Yes, I am old and hired experts to install the blinds, and we were told that for eighty dollars they would take down the old sets and take them away. I even went to the ATM to get a hundred to cover it and then looked at the job.

First I have to move the furniture from around the windows in six rooms - I can do that, and did. Then I looked at taking down the curtains where they were hung, and did that and put them into the laundry basket for washing. All that is left is taking down the old horizontal blinds and I start doing that. Now, there is likely an easy disconnect system that has been holding the blinds up for the last thirteen years, but I am better at destroying things than creating them - I am excellent at killing people in bunches and breaking stuff - they paid me well for that for years. Anyway, short story I have all the blinds down and before the last one dropped to the floor overcome by my efforts and gravity I think I figured out the quick disconnect. But I don't have anymore to practice on to prove it.

My mother called and gave me a welcome break, she wanted to talk about some man that yelled at her and made her feel terrible. I asked if she wanted me to beat him up or take him out - but she is much too good a Christian Lady for her to think that was a good idea. My theory about men that abuse women is that they are cowards, that is why they bully and beat on women - because they know they are afraid and want to be strong and tough - they do need to get a new point of view - as they eat dirt after a real man tries to whip them into shape (jellyfish-like works for me). I don't think my beating them up will change them, just confirm in their mind they need to hide their abuse better or they will get beaten again. Anyway after we discussed all the better stuff about her life and mine and caught up on everyone around us and whatzup (no, we didn't talk politics - we have real lives) I promised pictures of the new improved home in the mail - I have the before pictures already, love digital cameras with lots of memory. Gave her my love and took hers for me and my wife, who is out doing church stuff - where is she going to find community service time? Some days I hardly see her.

Once, long ago and far away in Oklahoma, my commander asked how my wife was, and I had to tell him I didn't know. There is a lump in the bed when I wake up to get to work, and when I come home at night there is a meal waiting for me and the clothes have been washed, but I don't dare waste any sleep time checking to see what is under that lump in my bed, but the next time I get a day off from being a Drill Sergeant I will check and find out if she is still speaking to me.

I did love being in the Army and Airborne and importantly useful in trying situations, but I love my wife and my ability to slowly work through the short remainder of my existence on Earth much more. Smooth Jazz is playing loudly and it is time for lunch and to check my mail.

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